I’d shout, hoooray!

In response to this: U.S. anti-gay group launches boycott of Ford

I post this:

ROD
Aah, an afternoon alone with
My favorite book, “Broadway
Musicals of the 1940s.”
No roommate to bother me.
How could it get any better than this?

NICKY
Oh, hi Rod!

ROD
Hi Nicky.

NICKY
Hey Rod, you’ll never
Guess what happened to
Me on the subway this morning.
This guy was smiiiling at me and taaalking to me

ROD
That’s very interesting.

NICKY
He was being real friendly,
And I think… he was coming on to me.
I think he might’ve thought I was gay!

ROD
Ahem, so, uh, why are you telling me this?
Why should I care?
I don’t care.
What did you have for lunch today?

NICKY
Oh, you don’t have to get
All defensive about it, Rod…

ROD
I’m NOT getting defensive!
What do I care about some gay guy you met, okay?
I’m trying to read.

NICKY
Oh, I didn’t mean anything by it, Rod.
I just think it’s something we should be able to talk about.

ROD
I don’t want to talk about it,
Nicky! This conversation is over!!!

NICKY
Yeah, but…

ROD
OVER!!!

NICKY
Well, okay, but just so you know —
IF YOU WERE GAY
THAT’D BE OKAY.
I MEAN ‘CAUSE, HEY,
I’D LIKE YOU ANYWAY.
BECAUSE YOU SEE,
IF IT WERE ME,
I WOULD FEEL FREE
TO SAY THAT I WAS GAY
(BUT I’M NOT GAY.)

ROD
Nicky, please!
I am trying to read….
What?!

NICKY
IF YOU WERE QUEER

ROD
Ah, Nicky!

NICKY
I’D STILL BE HERE,

ROD
Nicky, I’m trying to read this book.

NICKY
YEAR AFTER YEAR

ROD
Nicky!

NICKY
BECAUSE YOU’RE DEAR
TO ME,

ROD
Argh!

NICKY
AND I KNOW THAT YOU

ROD
What?

NICKY
WOULD ACCEPT ME TOO,

ROD
I would?

NICKY
IF I TOLD YOU TODAY,
“HEY! GUESS WHAT,
I’M GAY!”
(BUT I’M NOT GAY.)
I’M HAPPY
JUST BEING WITH YOU.

ROD
High Button Shoes, Pal Joey…

NICKY
SO WHAT SHOULD IT
MATTER TO ME
WHAT YOU DO IN BED
WITH GUYS?

ROD
Nicky, that’s GROSS!

NICKY
No it’s not!
IF YOU WERE GAY
I’D SHOUT HOORAY!

ROD
I am not listening!

NICKY
AND HERE I’D STAY,

ROD
La la la la la!

NICKY
BUT I WOULDN’T GET
IN YOUR WAY.

ROD
Aaaah!

NICKY
YOU CAN COUNT ON ME
TO ALWAYS BE
BESIDE YOU EVERY DAY,
TO TELL YOU IT’S OKAY,
YOU WERE JUST BORN
THAT WAY,
AND, AS THEY SAY,
IT’S IN YOUR DNA,
YOU’RE GAAAY!

ROD
BUT I’M NOT GAY!

NICKY
If you were gay.

ROD
Argh!

(and yes, the boa is particularly appropriate here. *grin* This is from Avenue Q, a broadway play starring puppets.)

~ by Skennedy on March 14, 2006.

6 Responses to “I’d shout, hoooray!”

  1. I seriously love Avenue Q. The internet is for PORN!

  2. I adore that soundtrack. :)

    On a somewhat related note, they played the Family Guy episode with the “Homocide: Life on Sesame Street” satire:

    Announcer: this show contains adult content and is brought to you by the letter H.
    Bert: Ah, hello? Son of a bitch, I’m on my way. Some poor bastard got his head blow off down by a place called Hoopers.
    Ernie: Bert, I wish you wouldn’t drink so much Burt.
    Bert: Well Ernie, I wish you wouldn’t eat cookies in the damn bed!
    Ernie: Bert, you’re shouting again Bert.

  3. I swear, there is no good resolution there that doesn’t hurt the company in some way. I’m glad, at least, that Ford is sticking to it’s guns and not pulling the ads. I’d rather have a bunch of openminded intelligent people as my target audience rather than a mob of angry stupid stupids. gah!

    (can you tell where I work yet?)

  4. I didn’t notice this before

    At the end of the article, it had a mention of how they planned to pull ads from gay-tagetted magazines until they changed their mind because of a boycott from gay rights groups?!

    What the heck is that!

    If I want to pull my advertisements, I pull ’em. Don’t need a reason. That just weird.

    Though, if I want to advertise, I advertise. I don’t need to worry about some group saying, “Don’t advertise in that magazine, that magazine offends me.” It’s an advertisement. Pure and simple. I advertise where it gets me money.

    And that includes advertising in publications that I may find personally objectionable. Like GAMES Magazine and Cat Fancy. Ewwww! Whatever brings me sales.

    Darn people.

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