Brainwaves of Sken

The big chore of the day was cleaning out my nightstand, where every piece of memorabilia I’ve gathered in the past thirteen years has been tossed (and transferred from place to place).

I found a lot of things, most of which I trashed. I stored every movie stub and concert ticket, including the signed Henry Rollins, the Matrix where we sat in the very front row and watched it twice, and the countless play bills starring girlfriends and best friends.

I tossed dozens of holiday cards, including some incredibly sweet ones for my 21st birthday.

I found a number of letters, too. Most of them were trashed, but one from a good friend anticipating being released from jail was touching and full of fervent desperation/anticipation.

A decade after anyone could possibly care, I think I understand someone I never did, through an old letter. Just so. I suppose I wish I wasn’t quite so self-involved (in my early 20’s, hah!). I never could get the hang of telling someone I loved them, but didn’t like them.

I used to carry, amongst the dozen photos and cookie fortunes, an Uthden Troll card in my pocket.

Red. 2/2. Regenerating.

I was pretty amazing. I’d like to be amazing again. It’s long past time to make that happen.

~ by Skennedy on August 28, 2011.

Posted in Big Things