On depression

superchicka: I definitely understand the impulse to want to hibernate and just fuck it all when things are down– almost like you want to get to the bottom and crawl up from there. That’s probably just me, though.
Yours Truly: *nod* I hide, too.
superchicka: do you shut people out or do you just kind of hide in the crowd?
Yours Truly: I don’t shut people out, but I am not clueless that, no matter how much people love me, I need to do the engaging or nothing happens. When I’m particularly depressed, I stop calling people, writing people, etc, and thus I’m in my own hole, sleeping or whatever, until either A) someone notices and pulls me out or B) I get sick of myself and do the same.
Yours Truly: Pushing people away is a big fear response, and that brings up my own challenge-response to the response. heh.
superchicka: I’ve recently decided that pushing people away is above all things selfish and degrading.
Yours Truly: degrading. good point.

*thoughtful*

(and no, I’m not even slightly unhappy)

~ by Skennedy on March 7, 2006.

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8 Responses to “On depression”

  1. It feels more degrading when you trust someone and they tell you to get over it. That’s why I don’t tell people what I go through. But then again, I don’t know that I push them away either. I just don’t bring it up.

    filmmaker79 said this on March 7, 2006 at 5:29 pm

    • “It feels more degrading when you trust someone and they tell you to get over it.”

      Sharing should not be done at your own expense, and telling someone who will react with derision or disdain is definitely on the “DON’T” list. Anyone who insists that they’re “fine” when they clearly are not is pushing people away.

      While it is true that sometimes a person (any person) can wallow in their own pain, telling someone to “get over it” is just… highly offensive.

      It is just that sort of thing that causes a person to fear sharing their problems in the first place.

      atdt1991 said this on March 7, 2006 at 6:35 pm

      • “It is just that sort of thing that causes a person to fear sharing their problems in the first place.”

        That’s the EXACT reason I am very selective about who I open up to.

        Yes, its on the DON’T list. The problem arises when you had no idea the person you were confiding in would say such things…especially when you can’t recall crying so violently.

        filmmaker79 said this on March 7, 2006 at 6:41 pm

  2. “selfish and degrading”

    seems abit harsh.

    ajaxx2 said this on March 7, 2006 at 6:08 pm

  3. Just found this yesterday:

    http://www.snac.ucla.edu/pages/Resources/Handouts/HOSerotonin.pdf

    Maybe, the isolation is a maladaptive behavior which we use unwittingly to try to balance serotonin and cortisol levels.

    clayfoot said this on March 7, 2006 at 6:10 pm

  4. You totally added that little postscript so that I wouldn’t text you going, “ZOMG what’s WRONG?! Tell me….!” *grins*

    Point zee way to zee depressed. I am armed with Girl Scout cookies (8 boxes!). No black hole can win over that

    blue_lucy said this on March 7, 2006 at 6:27 pm

  5. degrading to the pusher or the pushee? *is curious*

    atropis said this on March 8, 2006 at 4:30 am

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