Grandma says you can bullshit others if you must, but never bullshit yourself.
It has been an interesting year. I hope to go through my journal and create my annual report, as I have for the last three years or so – I really love the perspective it tends to bring me, as well as the act of reviewing my previous reports. I learn a lot in these moments, and they often provide me with a good month of thinking fodder. It takes forever to do, though, so I hope to start on it soon.
I’m at Lucy’s place for her family’s holiday party. I had quite a bit of fun today, actually, meeting some great friends of hers as well as jamming a bit to Guitar Hero II. I don’t even much mind sleeping on this ridiculously tiny bed – in order for my laptop to fit, my legs have to pop over the bottom.
We’ve had our fights this weekend – some over nothing much, some less so. In the end, though, we curled up together while we checked our emails, I rubbed her arms while her tongue lolled out like a puppy, and all was well.
I’ve heard through the grape-vine that I’ve had more mud slung at me, and frankly, I don’t want to get involved, and I don’t want to hear any more about it. When I said I was done with acknowledging or validating indirect or cruelly repetitive criticism, I meant it. If you’re out there pretending to dig me but you find me annoying, pretentious, or something else you’re not interested in from a friend … please do us both a favor. Why waste time chatting with someone you don’t really like? I wish you well, and I’ll do my human best to acknowledge your choice with grace and move on.
I’m sure I sound terrible to those who listen to the crap, and there’s nothing I can do about that. That’s been a hard lesson for me to grasp – I’ve lost friends to mud-slinging in the past, even when it’s blatant transference. I think it’s childish to rip on someone that way, hoping desperately that other people will come to dislike them as much as you do.
I don’t feel it necessary or appropriately mature to counter questions that haven’t been asked of me. Life’s rough, moving on.
I haven’t decided entirely whether I’m coming up for the various new years events in our various towns. I think I might stay here and play games with the Lucy and her folks. Good luck to all of you in 2007, here’s hoping you (and I) make the most of it.
I have so much to do in the next month. So much video work, it’s coming out of my ears. I do hope I get to see some or many of you in the days to come, but I’m going to have to budget my centrifugal travel, especially during the auto show. Please don’t be a stranger when it comes to visiting my place or meeting me in the middle somewheres – we’ll make it work somehow.
Stop writing about it, because that is only giving it power. It does not deserve power.
Take grandma’s example, say “suck it,” and know that your real friends value you for who you are, and are not talking shit behind your back. And your really good friends who may be listening to aforementioned shit will say, “i know you feel that way, but he’s my friend, so let’s talk about something else.”
You are, of course, right.
always. (wink, wink). Happy new year!
Same to you :) *kotc*